No More!

I absolutely, positively cannot handle another thing put on my plate.  I am just about maxed out.  I've lied to everyone that has asked, "So, what's new with you?" or "What's going on?"  What usually rolls out of my mouth is "not much" but it's a big fat lie.

I'm sick of work and I'm sick of working, if that makes sense.  I'm tired of feeling I have a target on my back and that I'm walking on egg shells at work.  I've been going through an appeals process at my work for a recent "corrective action" I received for posting a reply to a comment that a friend had put on Facebook.  I feel so strongly that I am not in the wrong but how do I fight a big employer.  I can't.  I went through the first 2 steps of the appeal process but I think I'm done.  I have no more fight in me.

Over Memorial Day weekend we, as a family, went to the Traverse City area with another family.  We rented two cabins and had a really good time.  To make a very, very long story short, I left my wedding ring there and the lady that owns the place is basically holding it hostage, if you will, stating that we owe her money for extra cleaning, plumbing charges, damage to the cottage, and her time to get the ring.  It's absolutely ridiculous.  She has threatened lawyers.  I finally called the Sheriff's Department and talked to a Deputy about the situation and he states she has absolutely no right to my ring.  Duh.  When we signed in she took our credit card number and keeps threatening to charge it but hasn't.  Needless to say, we're disputing the charges.  Honestly, I think she lost our paperwork or something otherwise she would have charged us, I think.

And there's my dad.  He has been settled in the nursing home for almost a year now but I'm still working on his finances and setting up some Medicaid planning for when the nursing home sucks him dry.  That is so time consuming in addition to paying his monthly bills.  For the past 3 weeks he has been very agitated and confused.  I get daily phone calls from the staff and sometimes even him.  He swears he is being held hostage and is pretty much living in the past.  I'm not sure he remembers much of the past 5 years.

On top of all this, my younger sister in West Virginia is in a bad place in her life.  She is not making smart decisions and I'm just praying that she gets her head on straight.  I fear one day I will get a call that something very bad has happened to her.   I worry for my mother-in-law who has been through a lot in the last 6 months and then the health of my aunt and uncle.  It's all there... swarming around in my very jammed packed brain!

And to add to all the craziness, we are putting our house up for sale.  Yep, that's right.  This is the best way I can sum it up:

Showings + Three messy kids = Mental Health Crisis for me

I am totally on board with this decision and really excited about moving but get palpitations thinking about keeping an even remotely tidy house that is ready to show at the last minute.  Arrggghhhh!

I need to clean out all the clutter in my life.  Both mental and physical clutter.  I feel like I have so many loose ends and I just don't know where to start sometimes.  I live in a perpetual states of tiredness and disorganization.  I never have just one thing running through my head but twelve.  For one day I want to feel "caught up."  To have the mail opened, read, bills paid, laundry done, dinner planned, the house cleaned, blah, blah, blah.  I know... unrealistic.  I know that one day I will miss all this!  It's all good, right?  Right.

Well, the thunderstorm just woke up Sarah.  I'm gonna skip cleaning the kitchen and snuggle instead.  The mess will be there waiting for me tomorrow!